Maria and Noelle's Awesome Adventure

Maria's here for Christmas! Here's a pictorial synopsis of our conquests....err....adventures.

Maria and I on the bus from Incheon airport.














Bongsuksa temple















































Maria and I at Mirae Taekwondo. If I could box up these kids and take them home...I totally would. However, I'm pretty sure that they could punch their way out of it.Gounsa temple

P*ngsan High School Festival (part 3)

P*ngsan High School Festival (part 2)

Look closely at this photo.

This is a Korean high school boy in drag.
I kid you not.

P*ngsan High School Festival (part 1)

As far as I know, every high school in Korea has an annual festival....and, as far as I can tell, this festival primarily serves as a day of sanctioned cross-dressing and public humiliation (all in good fun of course). P*ngsan's festival was spread over Friday and Saturday and provided me with a lifetime of blackmail material.

The structure was simple:
morning: games and food
lunch: food
afternoon: talent show and food
night: more awesome talent show and rock concert

An assembly kicked off the event. The principal gave a rousing speech in Korea, of which I could only understand "teacher" and "teacher's room." One teacher was snickering a little while the principal went on, and on. I figured he was giving a spiel on how hard the kids have worked all year and how much they deserved the day of fun, or was just warning the kids about poking their eyes out. I asked the teacher for a translation. I guessed wrong. The principal was scolding the students for starting the assembly 9 minutes late. He also criticized the student organizers for not giving schedules to the teachers before that day. When I learned this, I had to stifle a laugh, although none of the other teachers even tried to hide theirs. It was a 5 minute lecture. After he had covered all of the things that could've been better, the principal smiled and wished everyone happiness and fun. The students bolted out of the auditorium with such enthusiasm that I sometimes wonder if the principal purposefully set up the school-fun dichotomy to ensure the day's success.

To join the festivities in the morning, I had to pay 1000 won, which was annoying at first, but then I remembered how little money I've invested into the students all year and felt more like a charitable donation. One dollar to kick a soccer ball. How generous I am! ;) Students and teachers

I, myself, was lucky enough to have participated in the hilarity. As you all know, I'm a competitive person. When I enter a contest, I wanna win. So, when the school president asked me if I would participate in a "drinking contest," I didn't hesitate to acquiesce. "I'll wow them with my chugging skills," I thought. Two details he failed to mention: we were drinking newly opened Pepsi...from bowls. Now, this is a whole different ball game than chugging a glass of water (or beer for that matter). Pepsi is sugary and very fizzy out of the bottle, and the bowl was quite large. News spread that I was competing and a crowd gathered. I was so nervous of losing that I forgot to take a deep breath.

That was my downfall.

I am thoroughly convinced that if I had taken that breath, I would've won with flying colors. Ummm, that didn't happen. Instead, halfway through the bowl I realized that I needed some oxygen. Well, I opened my lungs and all that entered was the CO2 being released from my stomach. Shit. Meanwhile, I was painfully aware of all the eyes staring at my progress. Also, the Pepsi bubbles were now tickling my throat and making their way up my nasal passage. I came to the realization that I was gonna have to cough, give up, or pass out. These choices were totally unacceptable to me. Like I said, I'm slightly competitive. I still wanted to win! So, I told my body to shut up and obey. I opened my throat and downed the last inch of Pepsi in a painful gulp.

It didn't feel good. Looking around, I saw the girl who had barely finished before me. She was a seasoned pro at this. The look of inevitable triumph glistened in her eyes. My other opponent didn't fair as well. He was coughing up Pepsi left and right, gasping for air. And this was the kid who's pretty damn athletic and wants to be a PE teacher. Well, at least I kept a little of my dignity...I thought I made it through OK...until students kept asking me, "Are you OK?" My facial expression must have betrayed my stomach's absolute misery. "Uh yeah. That's way harder than it looks."

The top photo is of one of the relay races. The second photo is my co-teacher, Mr. Lee, pillow fighting another student. That's right. Festival Day is the only day where the teachers are allowed to hit the students (unlike other schools in Korea). I may not have mentioned this, but Mr. Lee is a formidable guy. He kicked the student's ass.

Left: My principal throwing water balloons at the school president

Right: Byeong-yong, the school president, is a soon-to-be-wet target.






*Notice the English written on the cutout. hahaha

English Club Hamburgers

I cost $90 and two trips to the butcher, but my students have finally made (and eaten) "real" hamburgers.

Dear Korea #1

Dear Korea,

First, I'd like to say that you're wonderfully hospitable. Also, I love your citron tea. Are you the only one who makes it? There are so many good things I can say about you and so much more I have to learn from you. That said, I'm curious about something.

Why do you refuse to heat the school hallways? It seems to me that the most logical way to heat a building is to close it up and keep all the heat inside at a moderate level. Granted, some locations are sure to be drafty, but, on the whole, the school's temperature will rise. However, you prefer your hallways to be frigid and your classrooms to be saunas in an effort to shake off the effects of said frigid hallways. This vexes me.

Many a day have I hastily shuffled through the mini-walk-in freezers (I am usually hunched over to minimize surface area so as to conserve as much body warmth as possible) only to be nearly blown over by the intense wall of heat blasted out of classroom doorways in quick Mario Brothers-like bursts. It's ok, Korea, I know the intention is not to topple over your foreign teachers with invisible waves of energy, and I refuse to believe this is simply an extension of your prevalent gaming culture. I am just confused at the situation in general.

When students enter the school in the morning, are the doors left wide open to remind them of where they're headed? Did those long hours of mandatory studying in the library push out more practical information such as directional memory? Are you afraid your students will be injured in the action of either the opening or closing the doors? Was there an "incident" in the past of which I'm not aware? Or, are they open as a metaphorical gesture of welcome, greeting bleary-eyed youngsters with freezing, gaping black holes leading to where the next 8 hours of their lives will slowly tick away?

I understand that you do things differently, Korea, and I would be more than happy to hear your reasoning behind this situation. Fulbright sent me here as a cultural ambassador, and I feel it is my duty to more fully understand your unique hallway experience. Until then, I will make better use of my long underwear and gloves outside of the classroom and will work to increase my coordination so as to not be blown off-course on my way to molding impressionable young minds.

Sincerely,
F*lbright Grantee Noelle

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday Samchon.

Things are looking up!

Things are looking up!

In the last two weeks I've received strawberry milk, coffee, a cracker, and a skittle from my students! Woot! I must either look particularly pathetic or my students are liking me more. I hope it's the latter, but if not, I still get free stuff.

TKD revisited

I've started taekwondo again. I'm sore, and I've never felt better. I attend classes 3 times a week, 2 hours a session.

The first session is lower level kids, and we do fun stuff like run laps and jump over each other. [By the way, I'm terrified of this activity. Why? Because I don't want to smash a child, which is highly likely due to the fact that I jump like a walrus...if they even jump at all.] I say "lower level" because there's a blue, green, purple, and brown belt mixed in with all the red/black belts. This is a class that does the most random activities. One day we played soccer with a grapefruit sized balls and landing pads for goals. The next day was devoted to speeches by the students (memorized stories) followed by a series of tests that measured your physical aptitudes. You remember those stupid "fitness days" in grade school? Yeah, we did something along the same lines: how many punches in a minute (I matched the 12 year old black belt on this one), how many squats in a minute (I tied the 10 year old), how far can you jump with both feet ( I think I failed that one. See previous statement.)

I have a feeling that the Grand Master usually didn't teach this class...until I joined. I've only recently been taught by the Master (who generally does most of the teaching at taekwondo gyms). He's probably my age, but as far as I can tell doesn't speak a word of English. He's very kind though. He's really cares about the kids and looks like he has fun every day. I wish I knew more, but can't really strike up a conversation, in a foreign language, mid-front kick. I'm working on getting his story. Baby steps...just like taekwondo.

I've given the kids American nicknames. I know it sounds terrible making up entirely different names because I couldn't remember their Korean ones, but, truthfully, they absolutely loved it! These kids have never had a foreign teacher before (perhaps never met a foreigner before) and felt so special being given an American nickname. I assigned names according to who the kids' faces remind me of. Thus, the first kid I named was "Mark" because he looks like Mark Hammill in Star Wars. I've also got a Jon, Natalie, Cody, Clay, Cole, Christian, Chris, Drew, Kayla, Nick, Sean, Cassie, Eric, Brian, Evan, and Charlie (yes, because he looks like Charlie Brown, bald and all).

The second session is all upper level kids. No one (besides me and my host brother) has lower than a red/black belt. I'm not going to lie, the first week was quite embarrassing. I hate being a spectacle and cannot avoid being one there. Remember in grade school when you couldn't hit a baseball and had to wait for your turn to let the team down? Yep, it's kinda like that...only there aren't any points, just your dignity. It is, needless to say, humbling in every sense of the word. The students take turns teaching me individually at the back. I feel awful tearing them away from a class that they're paying for, but on the other hand, I speak English to them, so they're getting another lesson for free. Picture this: Noelle in her yellow belt, learning the first poomse* from a 9 year old...and being schooled. He was so good! Nick sangsaenim ("teacher") used two words of English during his lesson, "Again," and "No." ...

Whenever I do join the 2nd class students in group activites, I forget that I'm 23 and revert to my past emotional state in middle school P.E. "Oh please don't let me embarrass myself," is the common inner monologue. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. A typical class goes kinda like this. "What the hell is that?" "Oh, that's just a backwards roundhouse, double front kick combo." *Noelle blinks* "So, what do I do?" *student shrugs*

For all that, the kids are extremely supportive and encouraging. They don't seem to make fun of me (at least that I can see), and the girls think of me as an "oni" ("older sister") according to my Grand Master. I love these kids. Photos coming soon.

Two poomse down, one to go to test for a blue belt, six to go until I test for a black belt.
- - - - - - - - - - -
*poomse (also called "forms")

"A Poomse (Form) is a pattern of pre-arranged Taekwondo moves, consisting of blocks, strikes and kicks.

While performing a Poomse, the Taekwondo practitioner uses his/her techniques to fight off imaginary opponents, attacking from multiple directions. Each of the WTF forms (Taegeuk 1-8) and all Black Belt forms (from Koryo to Ilyo) begin with defensive blocking techniques that are followed by counter attacks.

Each Poomse is to be practiced so many times that it can be performed without a thought (having to think of what the next move, direction or stance would be). Only after practicing a form, hundreds of times, will the student begin to understand its meaning."

http://www.academictaekwondo.com/poomse.htm

Thanksgiving

The F*lbright ETAs were invited to eat thanksgiving dinner at the Ambassador's Residence in Seoul. Ambassador Vershbow is a really cool guy...especially because he fed us more than I thought was humanly possible. It was an honor I won't soon forget. Thanksgiving felt more real when surrounded by amazing ETAs whom I've grown to adore. If only the local grocery store sold pumpkin pie! Then my holiday would be complete.

Cutsie Culture #6

The "Smile! Good! Happy Day 2030. Almond & Almond" notebook.

Um.

Smile! There's a girl with no eyes staring you down. You didn't think it was possible-until this moment. Why do I get the feeling that this kind of thing belongs only in David Lynch films...

Bad Handwriting

Bad handwriting can lead to miscommunication. For example:

I read:
"Students look like cod."

Actual sentence:
"Students look like cool."

More:
"My face was so terrible." (Wait, that was the actual sentence...)

Color at any age

Yes. I just sat down with the principal and we colored pumpkins. I was busy coloring my sheet for a thank you card, when the principal pointed out that it was "beautiful." I gave him a sheet of his own, and he got thoroughly involved in it. I even reminded him to sign it when he was finished and wrote "A+" at the top. So, now his blue/pink/purple/orange/green pumpkin is displayed on the teacher's room tack board, and I can honestly say that I've engaged my own principal, a man ranked substantially higher than me, in a kindergarten level task...and graded him.

Quickie

Saturday is a preemptive thanksgiving feast at the Ambassador's Residence in Seoul. I will be eating until...well...until they kick me out. Mmmm, pumpkin pie, mashed potatoes, salad, turkey. If only I could watch the OSU/UM game!!! [Will anyone be taping it?]

Korean SAT

Today was the day of reckoning for Korea's high school seniors. They have been preparing for this day their entire academic career. Today was SAT day.

You may not know much about the Korean SAT. It sounds awfully similar to the American SAT. But it differs in 3 ways:
1. Students can only take this test once a year.
2. This test scores almost exclusively determines admittance into a Korean university. Korean universities have quotas they must fill, so if your score is .5 behind the cutoff, you're cutoff.
3. Everyone takes this test at the same time nationally. Let me reiterate. At 10 AM, every high school senior in the country begins the English listening portion of the test.

This day is so important that Korea shuts down the airports because the planes will disturb the test takers. Younger students, parents, friends, and teachers all line up to cheer on the seniors as they enter the testing locations. Banners wishing them luck are posted EVERYWHERE.

Just imagine being a high school senior. No pressure.

I happen to think this is one of the most terrible aspects of the Korean educational system. To determine someone's future university almost solely on a single day of testing is, well, contrary to the spirit of education. Sure, it doesn't evaluate that one day, rather testing how hard the person has studied and memorized for the last year (perhaps 3 years). However, this test cannot measure a student's capacity to problem solve in real life. It cannot gauge the person's ability to engage in scholarly discourse, and it can certainly not determine potential. Granted, the American SAT doesn't address these either. Yet, the university admittance system is much more geared toward selecting individuals, not posting numbers. Perhaps I'm being swayed by my experience with the ND application process. Regardless, I still dislike the Korean one.

2-3 troubles

And the wrath of Noelle was unleashed today. Hell hath no fury like that of a teacher scorned by a spoiled, jaded high schooler.

One of my students had the gall to passive-aggressively make a comment about missing the last ETA. He was expressing his displeasure at my classes and their lack of games. I was...unhappy...due to his comment. Additionally, one student continued to sleep after I pointedly asked him not to. Another girl looked me in the eye and, though she can't speak 20 words of English, gave me attitude about doing the assignment. Attitude begets extreme attitude from my end. The students shrugged off their task as if it were an imposition on their busy schedules. Busy doing what? Listening to their mp3 players? Talking smack about their teacher with their friends? Sleeping?

Thus, a tirade ensued. They probably didn't even understand 75% of it, but it made me feel better chewing their asses out.

Funfetti Fun

I made funfetti cake today! Katie presented me with two boxes of cake mix along with the frosting for my birthday. I lugged them back to Korea and have now a tasty slice of heaven in front of me. I realized that I may be a bit too emotionally involved with funfetti cake when, after stirring the batter and depositing it into the pan, I gasped in horror as Oni took the empty bowl away and ran water over it. I was gonna lick that thing clean! I then had to nonchalantly brush it off and assure Oni she hadn't desecrated an essential honor of cake baking. *Sigh I've got one box left. I'm gonna have to strategically plan the baking of that one...and keep my paws on the bowl at all times to avoid further altercations concerning the licking of batter, or lack thereof.

P*ngsan

Cutsie Culture #5

The "I Can't Do It" notebook. I'm not quite sure if this is a bad translation, a misspelling, or the intended message. Perhaps it was meant as a challenge. You know, an in-your-face type of incentive to learn your fractions. I mean, I would have loved to have had a semi-creepy cartoon with dilated eyes reminding me of my intellectual inferiority...just so I could prove it wrong. Oddly, the cartoon would never seem as utterly defeated when proven wrong as I would when failing to correctly compute the surface area of a sphere.

The message is on every page.

A good day for a democrat

Take the reigns Pelosi!

Keith Olbermann rocks my socks.

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=3592217964261572444&q=keith+olbermann+clinton

Scum

I taught my English Club how to play "Scum" today. "What is scum?" they asked. Hmmm, I hadn't thought that definition through, so I replied, "You know that stuff at the bottom of ponds?" They seemed to get the drift, but for all I know, they may now think scum is a synonym for mud...or fish. So, in the future, if you meet a young person from Andong who responds with "scum" when you're pointing at koi...uhhh blame the Japanese.

An Actual Korean Friend

Friday night, I invited over Ji-won (Josepina) for a real birthday party. Ji-won works at the local Paris Baguette bakery, the one which I frequent on my way home from the bus stop. I average about 2.5 visits to that bakery a week. Thus, Ji-won and her sister know me quite well. They are the only Koreans I really talk to close to my age. They also make cake, so it was obvious to invite them to my birthday party. Unfortunately, Ji-won's older sister Michaela (I don't know her Korean name yet) was too busy baking to make it to the party, but Ji-won did! The cake was delicious! She made it that morning.

I learned that their store is family run and they work everyday-no days off. Ji-won is so sweet. She showed me her Cyworld website (similar to myspace, but more Korean, and better). Her pictures were professional photography quality. Coincidentally, she used to work at Seattle's Best Coffee in Daegu. She even gave me a Seattle's Best Coffee cell phone charm. I told Ji-won she'd have to take a day off work and give me a tour of Daegu. I can hope, can't I?

My host family was too funny on Friday. Oni cooked bibimbap, my favorite, and they all presented me with gifts after dinner. Hyon-oo gave me a White Angel chocolate bar, Hye-min gave me awesome ape socks that say "A Bathing Ape," Samchon gifted a Kim Jong Kook cd, and Oni (in her infinite wisdom and sense of humor) presented me with a poster of Bi (Rain). Chocolate is always a welcomed gift, and ape socks are beyond exciting to wear. Kim Jong Kook is one of the most beautiful human beings on the planet. Just look at the album cover. The Bi (translated to 'Rain' in English) was a little unexpected. I mean, I never thought my 40 something host mother would buy such an obviously pre-teen oriented poster in public. hahaha She surprises me everyday. I think it is hilarious and have therefore put it on my wall above my desk. Teehee.

More Halloween Fun

Surprise!

Ok, I officially love my English Club.

They surprised me with a birthday party-exactly what I needed today. Now, more than ever, I don't want to fail these kids as their teacher. If you zoom in, you can make out what some of the board says including:

So happy to meet you.
We love your class.
Starry, starry night.
You have beautiful eyes.
LOL.
I love your sister. (referring to Alexa)
Need I say more?

Birthday Surprises

First, thank you for all the birthday wishes. It means so much to me.

This time of year could have been difficult (with Halloween, my birthday, etc.), but hasn't because of incredible support (cards, notes, emails, presents) from my family, home friends, college friends, ETA friends, host family, co-workers, and students.

This morning I came into work and was ushered into the center of the teacher's room. One teacher had informed the vice-principal of my birthday and he bought a chocolate cake. They lit the candles (two tall, three short for 23) then sang the Korean version of Happy Birthday. The principal gave a short speech, of which I understood nothing other than the gestures to blow out the candles and cut the cake...which I did rather un-elegantly. I was then instructed to eat the cake and given chopsticks. It had never occurred to me that I would need to eat cake with chopsticks. And yes, it is as difficult as it sounds. The Koreans make it easier by making rather dry cakes that hold together, but it's difficult nonetheless. I'm happy to report I didn't drop cake down the front of my shirt, but then again, I ate very little cake out of sheer terror I would do just that.

The teacher who told the VP (Choi Nan-mi) is gradually taking me under her wing. Her husband is an English teacher, so her English is pretty good. In fact, I speak more English to her than I've ever spoken to the other English teachers (except Mr. Lee). She told me over lunch, "The vice-principal was glad it was your birthday, so he had a chance to thank you." "Thank me? For what?" "For the present you gave him from America, and teaching the students." "I get paid for that. Cakes aren't necessary!" Thus, I feel I've won over most of my co-workers through incessant bribery. Eh, I'm ok with that. Now, if only I could win over my students.

I was completely shocked by some students' reactions to hearing it was my birthday. One 2nd grader stopped me in the hall on his way to lunch and said, "Happy Birthday." I was floored. "Thanks! Guess how old I am." "21." "Nope, 23." He then shrugged as if any age over 18 was the same difference to him.

The 1-1 students all gasped, hooted, and hollered when I told them it was my birthday. It almost made me blush.

My 1-3 class actually sang happy birthday to me after taking roll. The students all smiled at me and gave me a simply fantastic feeling.

Min-yung, my host sister in 1st grade, left a giftbag on my desk with a cutsie pen and two purple barretts inside. Awwww...I'm totally gonna wear them tomorrow.

Finally, a 1-1 student named Sera hand crafted a birthday card. She presented it to me with a donut after school. Inside the card reads:

To Noelle
Noelle~:) I'm Sera~
I didn't know today is your birthday. Happy birthday, Noelle ~!!^^ Um...I don't know what you like so I thought so much. Finally, I decided that I give some cookies to you. I hope you lke it :) Noelle, I think you may be a little lonely in Korea. However!! You will like Korea soon. Then, Happy birthday to you again.
From Sera

She blushed profusely when she gave it to me. What a sweet, sweet girl. I just realized that I don't know her Korean name and am blushing myself.

I will treasure this card.

Happy Halloween!

I LOVE Halloween. It is my second favorite holiday of the year. (after Sept. 22-Bilbo and Frodo's birthday) I've been a little sad that I can't celebrate with the annual ND costume party, but decided to bring the party to P*ngsan.

Yes, I went to school with that on my face. Yes, people stared at me. The funny thing is people stare at me regardless of whether I have a giant insect on my face.

Activities today included an extremely entertaining round of student face painting. One of my punks got really into it. Only one girl was brave enough to put anything on her skin - cute little butterflies and a heart on the tip of her nose.

The guy second from the right painted bruises and a cut on his cheek, then ruffled up his hair and clothes and walked around like the resident bully had just shook him down for milk money (if P*ngsan had a bully, which it doesn't).

Sigh. I really love this holiday.